Following The Crowd

Despite my past reluctance to follow the latest trend of blogging (as I have always pegged it to be for those who are either married or going through an early mid-life crisis) I have decided to make the jump onto the ban wagon, and I’m taking the first steps to becoming an official blogger! Now, I know what you’re thinking, “What brought about this drastic change in opinion?” Though I am still completely oblivious to that answer, I believe I have a couple logical explanations.

1) Not that I have a plethora of stories worth reading or thoughts worth hearing, but ever since the new fad of “girlfriends” came out (which is slowly eating my friends and spittin ‘em back out as a big chewed up, boring, hermit crab, non-social people that used to be my friends) I have nobody to share the events of my life with. So at least this way I have some sort of artificial sense of being heard.

2) Past experience has proven that I am unable to stand in opposition to something for too long without eventually experimenting with the very thing I claim to be so against. For example, I once shared the views of 90% of males that shaving your legs is for the female race, and any dude who indulges in this act has just checked off 1 of 5 qualifications of being classified as a “faggot”. But thanks to the consequences of a lost bet made with a certain “swim coach”, I shaved my legs. Due to my hypocritical actions, I experienced taunting and puzzled looks from my peers. When asked to explain myself, I blame the situation on my avid cycling habits, rationalizing that it makes some sort of difference in speed and road rash recovery. The truth I never tell is that there is no better feeling than slipping into the bed sheets with freshly shaven legs (except for maybe a pair of brand new socks, or driving on a full tank of gas). That’s right folks, I am now 1/5 faggot…

So here is where the experimentation starts. We’ll see if it proves to be as good as shaving your legs.